It's Nothing Personal

A couple of weeks ago I was having a conversation with a friend about the way I handle some of the injustices I see in the world around me.

He pointed out that I always take it personally, I always make it about my own issues with life. I believe this a form of what many psychologists would call transference.

It permeates so many of my attitudes in both personal encounters and international politics. It is both a strength and a weakness. It is the former because it reflects empathy, which I believe lies at the heart of loving your neighbour as yourself. However it is also a weakness because if left unchecked, it puts you at the centre of things... which isn't healthy. It also leaves me exposed to attack.

Many years ago, my parents were once told by my art teacher, that I had a very powerful imagination... but that I had a tendency to act without focus, I let my raw emotions and imagination control what I put down on paper. It was a strength because I conveyed powerful themes, it was a weakness because there was so much going on, so many ideas flowing onto the empty paper in front of me; that it was hard to understand the message that was at the heart of my work.

Sometimes more is less and less is more.

It's one thing to be passionate, it's quite another to be reckless and utterly governed by your emotions... and when I see injustices in other people's lives, I am often governed by my emotions.

Conversely when it comes to acting on behalf of myself, I find myself confined by procrastination and inaction.

I need to find balance and refinement.

In my favourite sequence from the film Highlander, Connor (Christopher Lambert) is being taught by Ramirez (Sean Connery). He is taught among many things, that if he overextends his thrust, he becomes off balance and vulnerable. This is exactly what happens with me. when I become emotionally attached to a topic. I throw my weight so readily into the battle, that I leave myself wide open. Sure I score a few mighty blows against what I'm facing... but I'm clumsy and I take a heck of a beating in response.

Ramirez teaches Connor that he must learn to harness his power.

This is something I need to do also.... under God's direction.

I can't go on being all or nothing. I can't just move from procrastination to nuclear assault and back again. I need to be passionate but measured.

Roger Morris once advised me that if I was not careful, I ran the risk of living my life defined by others... and he's right. I need to take on board what my friend said about taking things personally... but I must not assume I am completely wrong... because I am not my friend... I am me. My role and purpose in life is not identical to his. I must not allow myself to be made in the image of others. God has a shape in mind for the man I am to become and it's not the shape of any one person I know.

After all, "love your neighbour as yourself" is the SECOND greatest commandment. The FIRST is to "love the LORD your God with all your heart, with all your mind and with all your strength". We need to make sure that God is at the centre and not ourselves, or anyone else.

Jesus had the complete human emotional experience... but never once did any one of those emotions overrule the most important emotion of all... love for the Father.

I intend to touch more on the subject of being defined by others"in the near future. For now though I want to leave you with this thought:

Listen to your friends, and heed their advice, but don't make pleasing them the heart of what you do. Don't lose sight of who and what God called you to be. You can serve your friends and yourself better by making sure God remains at the centre of things. I'm not talking religion here, I'm not talking about merely obeying what your vicar or pastor says... I'm not talking about surrendering your emotions to doctrine like a robot.I'm talking about taking your emotions and thoughts to God and engaging with him on these things. A relationship with God is not about rejecting your emotions and passions... it's about embracing them in the context of his will.

Cobwebs

Right it's time to sweep out the cobwebs and blow the dust off of this place.

I've been gone too long. I've been suffering from a dry spell of late... and I've not been keeping the blog up to date. Sometimes if you just leave things, time moves on around them and they change and move on without you... and they can easily become unrecognisable:

I feel like I've stumbled upon one of my thinking places up Cold Comfort Lane. If I don't go to them for a lengthy period of time, they get overgrown with brambles and I can't use them until they are cleared.

It's a bit like walking back into a church that's been left empty for too long. However, there is a difference between a church that is empty and a church that is deserted. This blog is most definitely not destined to fall into the latter category, not while I still feel it serves a purpose both personally and publicly.

So as we draw nearer to Christmas, I hope to up my work rate somewhat. I need to. I need to get my creative juices in full swing again. I know striving is not the answer... my best inspiration comes from above. However while fire may not come without wind... sometimes you need to rub sticks together to prepare a catalyst for when the divine wind comes. It's not about doing things in your own strength; it's about making sure you are in a position, a frame of mind, to receive what is freely given.

I've had a similar debate about this with people who prefer to remain away from attending church on self-imposed sabbaticals while they wait for revival to come. I maintain that while the race may not be run until God moves... part of discipleship and faithful service to him, is our willingness to be ready. Paul puts it far more eloqouently:

"Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize.

Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last; but we do it to get a crown that will last forever. Therefore I do not run like a man running aimlessly; I do not fight like a man beating the air. No, I beat my body and make it my slave so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for the prize."

1 Corinthians 9:24-27

So while it's important not to rush ahead and act without God... it is extremely healthy for us to spend time focussing on him, flexing our spiritual muscles so that when the starting pistol sounds, we are off the blocks in the best possible condition. Don't misunderstand me here... I'm not saying we have to slave away or God won't pour out his blessing. We are not the centre, God is... if he needs to do something powerful through us and we still aren't ready despite his prompting, his abundant transforming grace is there for us. My argument is merely that we have the option to choose a beneficial course of action while we wait for God... and not just the freedom to choose a permissive one.

Well, this post was just intended to be a quick wave through the window to get me back into good habits... a toe in the water, but already just the act of sitting in front of a blank screen has borne fruit.

So until next time (and by next time, I don't mean next month), be blessed.